And you want me to fix this how?

So, as I'm getting my 13 month old ready into her jammies tonight, the nursing home calls. The nurse (who is one of my favorites there) tells me that my mother's been agitated and combative this evening and they need me to come down. Of course, my husband's out of town, so I start calling friends to see who's home on a Saturday night that could watch my kids.

I drop the girls off, and head to the nursing home. When I walk in, Mother is bebopping down the hall toward the dining room. I catch up to her and she says to me in an accusing tone, "You've been to a football game!" I said, "Uh, no, actually I was getting the kids ready for bed when the nurse called and said I needed to come here because you were upset. What are you upset about?" She said she was mad because she didn't "get to help," so I asked what she didn't get to help with. She answered, "the football game."

I got her back to her room, and after three tries, into her jammies. Then the med aide came around with a sleeping pill for her. I sat with her a few more minutes till she started to get drowsy, and tucked her into bed. I even kissed her forehead, like I do my girls.

I gotta wonder though - exactly what does the nursing staff think I can do anout her behavior?

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There's a first time for everything!

So, until recently, I didn't even know exactly what a blog was! And I certainly didn't imagine I'd have one.

But, after caring for my mother (who has Alzheimer's) for nearly a year now, I need a place to "brain dump." And, by doing so here, maybe I can give helpful information, make someone laugh, or just let others in my situation know they're not alone.

A little background:
My mother (who is now 69) has been showing some early signs of Alzheimer's for a couple of years. She's also had some other issues my whole life, including hyopchondria, paranoia, and depression. She has exhibited a lot of attention-seeking behaviors for a long time - usually being "sick." For a very long time, the world has revolved around her. For instance, when I told her I was pregnant last year (a HUGE surprise for everyone!), her exact reation was, "Hmmm...(pause)...Have I told you I've been sick?"

She and my dad (who was 78) were living at home, with him taking the path of least resistence with her. If she wanted to be "sick," he took her to the doctor - at least once a week. If she only wanted to eat ice cream, he kept the freezer stocked.

For the last couple of years, she's repeated the same conversation every time I called (usually a recap of her "illnesses"). She hasn't remembered my birthday since I was 16. She'd lose her train of thought mid-sentence. No one big thing, just lots of little things.

Then, last November, my dad had a stroke, falling to the floor unconscious next to their bed. My mother covered him with a blanket and went to bed 6 feet away. She couldn't even get it together enough to call 911, or even step out on the porch and scream for the neighbor. Fortunately, a family member went by the next morning, suspecting something was wrong, and found him on the floor and her asleep in the bed. My dad died 2 days later.

After the funeral, we packed her up and brought her 600 miles home with us. I tried having her in my home, while my husband and I considered getting her an apartment in the local retirement community. It became obvious that she could not take care of herself, and we could not provide adequate care for her at home. So, off she went to a nursing home (a very good one - my husband's aunt is an RN there, and I worked there a couple of years ago).

So, that's the beginning of our journey. And, as it's 2 am, that's all for tonight.